january 16, 2001; tuesday


12:26am

*hi. i'm still thinking today is yesterday so any "today"s in there in the beginning are actually yesterday, monday, martin luther king jr. day.*

so ca was gonna have me go with her and the ash group to go snowboarding. and then she asked neil too. yeah. so we could'a gone but then there were too many people going. meh. so then i get this great idea... neil can come up here anyway and SAY he's boarding and we can spend a couple'a days/night together. i ask him today. his response? "pish, NO. like i'm doing THAT." um... ok... ouch. so then i tell him about a dream i had. he told me he never wanted to see me again. and not like we are, but in the dream we were going out and he broke up with me. to make it worse, his response when i told him? he laughed hysterically at it and shrugged it off. last time i had that problem nathan was all cute about it and apologized and said he'd try not to ever do that again and not be mean in my dreams as if he could really do something. neil just laughed. ouch again.

today was my last day of work. my hours were all switched around. oh well. i'm coming in friday to get my paycheck and then the last one they're gonna mail to me. i don't understand why they didn't just do a voucher. i mean... two days. ok, that's a who $20? uh... yeah. i see the need for a check. pish. whatever.

i miss having people to talk to. it sucks. now i don't really know what to do with myself now that i'm not working. it's just a week or so but... still. i'm so pathetic.

i went to planned parenthood today. we went for jie but then i got to the window first and then they looked at jie and said that i was the last drop in. i felt bad. oh well. we're going in... um... today today. tuesday. yeah. i got 3 months of birth control (yaaay! no more 7 days of bleeding and cramping for betty!!! yaaay!!!!) and a million and two colored condoms. as if i'm super sex woman... uh... no. i'll prolly just give'm away again. yup. anyway. gonna go now. uh huh. going. gah i'm so sad. my throat hurts and it's all scratchy and i'm coughing like mad. neil laughed about that too. i'm beginning to see a trend.

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