february 20, 2001; tuesday


10:47am

went boarding on sunday. it was jolly good fun. john john was too tired to drive back so we stayed at his friend, brandon,'s parents house. it was really nice. brandon's daughter was the cutest. her name's vivian. four years old. soooo adorable. she said the cutest things and made the cutest faces. came back yesterday but it was late and i was an hour late for printmaking. but that's ok. didn't do much anyway. i felt so sick. i went to ceramics and finished up my happy mouse and piggy and they're gonna be on the greenware shelf soon. i'm excited :)

i kept going in to neil and jeremy's room yesterday. neil got really frumpy all of the sudden at lunch and i wanted to ask if he was ok and/or if he wanted to talk but i never got it out. i've been kinda scared to talk to him or ask him stuff. it's my fault too. i hype myself up and then get let down. i've missed him a lot and i like him. anyway. so i went in and sat there and he smiled this really cute smile back at me. i was totally giddy it was pathetic. so there i was, running back and forth rooms (my internet was being super slow and took forever to load a page so i'd go there while waiting for the page) all hyper and giddy. i was bored and soooore (i'm in immense pain. my ass and knee... ow. can't move my arms very much either.) so i just sat there after i turned off my computer. he turned on the t.v. and we watched ally mcbeal. he had his mushy pillow and i like it but i didn't care for it. he sat really close to me and i really wanted to flomp but i couldn't cuz i was pretty sure he'd push me off and... ouch. yeah. but then i took the pillow and he layed on my lap. i touched his arm and he held my hand. i was so happy. i have no idea what happened on ally. i was just... *sigh*. i'm lame. anyway. i had a cuddle buddy last night but this morning he was kinda dazeyish and i'm afraid he's rethinking and it was just a one night cuddle thing. that'd suck. with my luck that's how it is. but i'm happy for now.

my camera's been funky doo lately. it's super bright with the lighting and it's sucky.

i want my damn qball. it's taking forever. ok, so it's been a few days. shaddup. i want it noooooow. so neato :) ok, gonna go wake up now. class isn't till 1:30pm but neil was up at 9am so i woke up too and i'm here. yup. i'll prolly nap later. ok ok, going.


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