march 15, 2001; thursday

11:50 am

i cut myself with my scribing tool. v cut it's in the shape of a v. it's funny. too bad it hurts like a poo. yes. poo hurts.

i look like serious poo today. really. so bad that i'd break the camera trying to show you. you wouldn't wanna see anyway. it'd cost you your monitor screen breaking and the computer freaking out and possible reformatting necessary. i started the girly suckiness yesterday. pain. i had 3 different dreams of my teeth falling out. i could feel it happening and the pain and i tasted the blood... but it didn't really happen. teeth falling out in dreams is suppoesd to mean insecurity. that's me.

i went home last weekend. amity came over friday and we went shopping with ca and then went to see chris at the airport (jon and his friend nick brought us) and it was boring. they sat there and talked and amity and i went to the kiddy thing to play. susan and chris are still going good. they seem to really like each other. it's cute :) chris hasn't hung out with ca and me yet so i dunno if he's really fun or not. he was totally nervous coming off the plane. poor guy. had to run and pee right after he saw us :) jon scared the willikers out of am and me in the airport and everyone laffed. it was embarassing. oh well. am and i were tired. i think that's why it was extra boring.

packed a lot of stuff. i got to this depressed point and started throwing everything in the sell/trash category and my stuff went down a lot. i still have a bunch of crap to go thru tho. sucky. it was sad going thru school stuff and seeing how i don't remember ANYTHING and that all those notes... useless. just went to the recycle bin. realized how pointless high school really was...

i gotta go back this weekend again to pack some more. oh. monday i went to the dentist for the first time in like a year (really...) i have three new cavities (joy) and need my wisdom teeth pulled. didn't know they were even there. but turns out that that's cuz they're growing in. literally... they're growing towards the molars. my mouth's too small. went to the chiropractor too. that hurt. did this electric therapy... that hurt afterwards. got x-rays done... the bottom two discs of my spine have a really small space in between; smaller than normal. sucky. nothing can be done about that. i gotta see a masseuse. basically my pain is muscle stuff. bleeah.

andre called back. he was kinda upest i didn't call back too. i didn't think he'd still be interested. i was a total freak.

neil's been super cute lately. all cuddly. too bad he works like mad (4:30pm-12:30am) and i don't see him much. he's so warm and squishy.

my back hurts. i go now.

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